I Love You, Goodbye
by Kuramastrass
Summary: Kurama has to choose between living with his mother or without her, living as a human or as a demon. He can't take it anymore, being torn in two. When he finally makes his choice, he chooses not what is best for him, but what he thinks is best for Shiori.


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**Hey, everyone. I'm back. Ain't it grand?**

**I don't own YuYu Hakusho or anything even closely related to it. Well, except plushies. And my own set of manga.**

**This is a one-shot I wrote a while ago... I just got around to typing it up, after having to hand-write it _again_ after my dad threw the original away... I don't think it came out as well. Oh well. And I didn't spend a ton of time editing it, so be nice about any mistakes, okay?**

**Oh, and a warning... this is sorta depressing. (Well, _I _think it is. When I re-read it, I start to cry.) Read at your own risk. Don't say I didn't warn you.**

**Well, I guess that's it... I'll try to get back to posting stuff, promise. So, enjoy my first fanfiction in a while. Here's "I Love You, Goodbye."**

This couldn't go on. He couldn't go on existing like this, as two total opposites. The human and the demon couldn't co-exist any longer.

He had to choose which he was going to be. One of his identities was to continue existing... and the other was to be lost to time.

He had to choose.

"Hello, Sakura. May I speak to Mother?"

He chose neither.

- -

The choice had to be made more for his mother than for himself. And it was _because_ of her that he could not choose.

He could not go on living this double-life. One way or the other, she would be hurt.

If he gave up his humanity, left her forever... that would break her heart. And it would break his. Besides, if he left, who would protect her from demons who had found their connection? He had made many enemies in his life...

On the other hand, he couldn't stay with her as a human. His demonity was too valuable to give up... His true nature would have to emerge again eventually, to protect her. And the cycle would continue.

He could choose neither.

The best thing for her... would be to end his existence completely.

"Hello?"

His face melted into a smile at the sound of her voice, a true smile. "Hello, Mother."

He imagined the look on her face, identical to his own. "Hello, Shuichi. How are you?"

"I'm fine, Mother. And I apologize for not calling lately... but I wanted to wish you a happy Mother's Day."

"It's all right," she answered. And it _was_ all right – he was her perfect son. He could do no wrong.

"How are Shuichi and Sakura?" he asked her, wondering about his two part-siblings.

Shuichi the younger refused to have any contact with his older step-brother. The perfect son had abandoned his mother when she was more sickly than ever, when she needed him the most.

Sakura, who had never really known her eldest sibling, was completely devoted to Shuichi the younger. She only spoke to Shuichi the elder when she answered the phone.

"Shuichi was just promoted at his job, and Sakura has been busy at school lately, with many tests."

"Her grades are high, I assume?" It was no secret that he preferred the girl to his step-brother.

"Yes." _Though not nearly as high as __yours__ ever were,_ she thought.

The redhead glanced at the clock. Had he truly been speaking to this woman for less than five minutes? "Well, Mother, it's getting late. I have to go."

"All right."

"I don't know if I'll be able to call you tomorrow."  
"That's all right; call whenever you can."

"I will. I love you, Mother. Goodbye." And before she could answer, before she could say that she loved him, too, he hung up.

And those were the last words he would ever say to her.

_I love you. Goodbye._

- -

He sat in his car, now, nearing two in the morning. He drummed drunkenly on the dashboard with his fingertips, a lit cigarette in his other hand.

He had gone to a bar for the first time in his human life – it reminded him so much of his past life. Drunken females approached him, as well as a few drunken men (thinking he was female). Normally he would have enjoyed the attention, but not tonight. Tonight, he had other things on his mind.

Any normal human would be completely intoxicated by now, but he was not normal. And he was coming dangerously close to being so intoxicated that he would fail to properly accomplish his mission.

He glanced at the radio's clock, now, not knowing exactly what it was that he was waiting for. Was he... nervous, unsure?

No, this was for the best. He knew that.

It was five minutes to two. It was now or never.

It was now.

Slowly, he pulled out of the parking lot onto the empty road. Though he drove carefully, it was harder than normal.

Driving at a high speed would be fun.

Soon he made it onto the highway, going well over the speed limit. The car started to swerve, as he was struggling to keep it straight.

But soon someone appeared behind him, the only other person on this lonely road. He was going even faster than the redhead – soon, he would pass him.

But he would become a witness.

Gripping the wheel tightly, he drove his car into the concrete strip separating the two halves of the highway.

Shuichi the younger was driving home from work that night. He had had to stay late at work; he was adjusting to having more responsibilities. And now it was 2 A.M. He was tired, and not really awake enough to pay much attention to the road. Luckily for him, there was only one other car on the highway before him.

But that car suddenly swerved straight into the median.

He shouldn't care. Normally, he _wouldn't_ care. But his curiosity was aroused. It was so early in the morning – who else was driving at this hour? And he had swerved so suddenly – was it really accidental? And it had happened just as he had gotten behind him...

Shuichi the younger slowed and then stopped. He climbed out of his vehicle and walked over to inspect the state of the driver. Was he still alive, or was he...?

Shuichi the elder was not killed on impact, as any normal human would have been. He did not open his eyes, but after a few seconds he realized that he was still alive. But he could feel himself slipping.

He heard footsteps walking toward him in the quiet of the night. The other driver. Then he heard a gasp and a familiar voice. "God! Shuichi..."

Subconsciously, a smirk formed on his face. Good. He couldn't have found a better witness. Shuichi could report directly to his mother.

The pull was stronger now. He had accomplished his mission, or, rather, he was _about_ to accomplish his goal.

His life – _existence_ – was complete. He had committed the ultimate act of devotion and sacrifice. He had successfully died for his mother.

And so, with that, he formed his last conscious thought before slipping into the unconsciousness called death.

_I love you, Mother. Goodbye._

- Kuramastrass -


End file.
